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Campus News | In Memoriam

By Sarah Johnson

October 1, 2019


Photo Credit: Jessica Jones, Omnibus

Someone is trying to murder me. I just have to figure out who. Fit & Well class no longer matters-- not that I was too worried about that before I had a hit-man after me. I scan the class, making eye contact with a select few. One in particular had snuck glances at me multiple times throughout class. That must be him. Panic pervades me. How will I escape? He has me trapped in this sweat-scented hole of a classroom. Could I try to outrun him? No, no; if this class has taught me anything, it’s that exercise is far worse than death. Maybe I could outsmart him. I run through possibilities in my mind. What do I have that he doesn’t have? Suddenly, it hits me; I know how I’ll escape-- by using my femininity. I’ll hide in the bathroom where my male hit-man cannot enter.


I check my phone for the time: 11:48, almost to the close of my 11:00 class. Adrenaline fills my veins, and I start packing my things, all the while keeping one eye on my hit-man. He hasn’t even started putting away his notebook yet. I chuckle; what an amateur.


I finally hear those long-awaited words: “You are dismissed.” I take off like a rocket. Ain’t no man gonna take me down. I make a beeline for the bathroom. I look behind me several times, never once seeing that familiar face. I stop cold. If he really wanted this, he’d be on my tail. Realization comes over me: he’s trying to trick me into a false sense of security. He’ll wait for me outside of the bathroom and shoot me when I come out. Well, I can’t let him do that, now can I? I change my course to go outside, hoping to make it to Mellers before he attacks. I scurry up the sidewalk, trying to blend in until we reach the building.


Reaching the building, I breathe a sigh of relief. He didn’t follow me. I’m safe. I join the line for whatever is being served at Meller’s feeling pretty proud of myself. “Hi, Sarah,” registers in my ears, and I look around trying to decide if the greeting was aimed at me or one of the other 37 Sarahs on campus. The person was already lost in the crowd. I brush it off, get my gyro, and head back to my seat to my friends. The conversation consists mostly of the hit-men roaming campus, and we all get up to leave. I checked my back to make sure Fit & Well guy wasn’t following and was satisfied to see he wasn’t. My friends scattered to go to class, and suddenly I was alone walking the long hallway to the union. I check behind me a few times, and only see one non-threatening guy walking behind me.


Feeling pretty good, I leave the building. I got a few steps and turned to check behind me. The non-threatening guy was still there, but no one else. I turn back around and out of the corner of my eye, I see him charging across the forum with his gun trained on me. “Gotcha!” I hear from his mouth, in the same voice that I heard greet me at Mellers. Oh no. I began sprinting toward my dorm. Fear fills my chest. I see my life flash before my eyes: all the fun times with friends and family, birthdays, holidays, that time I got an extra strip at Chick-Fil-A. I don’t want to die; I have so much more to do. I run harder, but I soon feel that dreaded coolness on the back of my leg. I collapse, dead. I’ve been eliminated, and on the first day, too. I stood in that insane line for twelve years for nothing. I make a covenant with myself, right there, lying on the ground, that next year, Spy Week would end differently.


Photo Credit: Jessica Jones, Omnibus

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Infuse Student Media or Southwest Baptist University.

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